Subject: Sports » Golf (Page 11)

My golf game's gone off so much that when I went fishing a couple of weeks ago my first cast missed the lake.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Golf, especially championship golf, isn't supposed to be fun, was never meant to be fair, and never will make any sense.

author
Golf Sports

Fairway: The well-kept and seldom used portion of a golf course.

Definitions Golf Sports

I played golf. I did not get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. … you're supposed to yell, Fore! but I was too busy yelling, “There ain't no way that's gonna hit him!”

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Golf Sports

Chip Shot: A short, low approach shot that gets a player into position for one or more missed puts.

Definitions Golf Sports

The least thing upsets him on the links; he missed short putts because of the uproar of butterflies in the adjoining meadows.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics Golf Sports

I wouldn't trust him to sit on a toilet the right way.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

If you’re caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron; not even God can hit a 1-iron.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
God Golf Sports

The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf.

Appearance Body Golf Murphy’s Laws Sports

Golf is essentially an exercise in masochism conducted out of doors.

Golf Sports

Golf is my real profession – show business pays my greens fees.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Acting Entertainment Golf Sports

Always keep in mind that if God didn't want a man to have mulligans, golf balls wouldn't come three to a sleeve.

(1929 – ) American author & sportswriter
Golf Sports

Businessman: One who talks golf all morning at the office, and business all afternoon on the links.

Definitions Golf Occupations

You can talk to a fade but a hook won’t listen.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

The shortest distance between any two points on a golf course is a straight line that passes directly through the center of a very large tree.

Golf Murphy’s Laws Problems Sports

At first a golfer excuses a dismal performance by claiming bad lies; with experience, he covers up with better ones.

Beliefs Golf Honesty Lies Sports

I know I’m getting better at golf because I’m hitting fewer spectators.

(1913 – 2006) 36th U.S. president
Golf Sports

There are two reasons for making a hole in one; the first is that it is immensely labor-saving.

Golf Sports

I wouldn't say God couldn't have got out of it, but he'd have had to throw it.

(1929 – 2016) American golfer
Golf Sports

Handicap: An allocation of strokes on one or more holes that permits two golfers of very different ability to do equally poorly on the same course.

Definitions Golf Sports

Gimme: An agreement between two duffer golfers who can’t putt.

Definitions Golf Sports