Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Success
(Page 3)
After a fellow gets famous it doesn’t take long for someone to bob up that used to sit by him in school.
Frank ‘Kin’ Hubbard
(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Success
Fame
You’re not famous until my mother has heard of you.
Jay Leno
(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Mothers
Success
Celebrity
Fame
Eighty percent of success is showing up.
Woody Allen
(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Success
Showing up
If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
Steven Wright
(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Success
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
Groucho Marx
(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Husbands
Men
People
Success
Wives
Women
The only reason she made it to the top was because her clothes didn't.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Clothing
Success
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
Maryon Elspeth Pearson
(1901 – 1989) wife of Lester Bowles Pearson, Canadian prime minister
Men
People
Success
Women
Surprise
Getting worried there might not be enough talent in America to accommodate all these singing shows.
Natasha Leggero
(1974 – ) American comedian
America
Places
Success
Talent
If at first you don’t succeed, blame your parents.
Marcelene Cox
writer
Family
Parents
Success
Some have greatness thrust upon them, but not lately.
Frank Dane
(1902 – 1963) Danish actor
People
Success
Time
Greatness
Political success is the ability, when the inevitable occurs, to get credit for it.
Dr. Laurence J. Peter
(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
Politics
Success
Credit
One day you are a signature, next day you’re an autograph.
Billy Wilder
(1906 – 2002) Austrian journalist, filmmaker, screenwriter & producer
Success
Autographs
Celebrity
I was sorry to have my name mentioned as one of the great authors, because they have a sad habit of dying off.
Mark Twain
Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
People
Self
Success
About the only problem with success is that it does not teach you how to deal with failure.
Tommy Lasorda
Los Angeles Dodgers’ manager
Baseball
Sports
Success
Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.
Ambrose Bierce
(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Success
In this world there are winners and losers – and, of course, ‘the others’, who comprise the majority.
Simon Munnery
(1967 – ) English comedian
Failure
People
Success
Losers
Winners
Some of the world’s greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible.
Doug Larson
(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
People
Success
Possibilities
Hemingway hated me; I sold 200 million books, and he didn't… of course most of mine sold for 25 cents.
Mickey Spillane
(1918 – 2006) American writer
Books
Communication
Success
Ernest Hemingway
It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.
Robert Benchley
(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Communication
Reading/Writing
Success
Celebrity
Life is strange; every so often a good man wins.
Frank Dane
(1902 – 1963) Danish actor
Characteristics
Individuals
Life
People
Success
Good
Dirty blonde … I made myself platinum, but I was born a dirty blonde.
Mae West
(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Appearance
Body
Success
Dirty blonde
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