Author: George Bernard Shaw Page 2

Alcohol… enables Parliament to do things at eleven at night that no sane person would do at eleven in the morning.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Alcohol Food/Drink

Patriotism is the conviction that your country is superior to all others because you were born in it.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Beliefs Government

My mother married a very good man… and she is not at all keen on my doing the same.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Marriage

A doctor’s reputation is made by the number of eminent men who die under his care.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Death Doctors Health

In order to fully realize how bad a popular play can be, it is necessary to see it twice.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Reviews/Criticism

The faults of the burglar are qualities of the financier.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Occupations Work

I knew if I waited around long enough something like this would happen.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Death Epitaphs

The brain is entirely fat… without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Intelligence

We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Activities Age Old

Never fret for an only son, the idea of failure will never occur to him.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Failure Problems Success

The 100% American is 99% idiot.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
America Insults People

Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? … If he knows anything about it, he shouldn’t!

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Beliefs Religion Sex

War does not determine who is right – only who is left.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Conflict People War

Martyrdom is the only way a man can become famous without ability.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Death

Which painting in the National Gallery would I save if there was a fire?… the one nearest the door of course.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Art Entertainment Situations

A drama critic is a man who leaves no turn unstoned.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Communication Entertainment Wordplay

A woman whose face looked as if it had been made of sugar and someone had licked it.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Appearance Insults

We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth without producing it.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Emotions Happiness

There is no satisfaction in hanging a man who does not object to it.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Death

He who can, does; he who cannot, teaches.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
People Work

Everything happens to everybody sooner or later if there is time enough.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
People Situations Time