Subject: Appearance » Fat

Underneath this flabby exterior is an enormous lack of character.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor

Fat: Energy gone to waist.

I have a doctor's appointment on Monday; I'm not even sick – it's just that I've been working out, and I want someone to see me naked.

American comedian

He is so fat… he can't even jump to a conclusion.

There's a new slimming course just out where they remove all your bones; not only do you weigh less, but you also look so much more relaxed.

(1919 – 1985) Scottish comedian & actor

I thought to myself, join the army… it’s free; so I figured while I’m here I’ll lose a few pounds… I’m going to walk out of here a Lean, Mean, Fightin’ Machine!

(1950 – 1994) Canadian actor & comedian

Seamstress: 250 pounds in a size 6.

He's so fat… when he goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate.

I keep trying to lose weight… but it keeps finding me.

Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

You know your girlfriend is getting fat when she can fit into your wife's clothes.

(1964 – ) American stand-up comedian

It's a good thing Babe Ruth isn't still with the Yankees. If he was, George Steinbrenner would have him bat seventh and say he's overweight.

American baseball player

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist

She is so fat… when you tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.

She is so fat… she laid on the beach and people tried to push her back into the ocean.

You know you're getting fat when you can pinch an inch on your forehead.

comedian

Lord, if I can't be skinny, please let all my friends be fat.

(1936 – 2005) Irish comedian

Alfred Hitchcock: One look at you and I know there's famine in the land.

Shaw’s reply: One look at you, Mr. Hitchcock, and I know who caused it.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist

I have to work out like a tri-athlete just to maintain chubby.

comedian

She is so fat… her favorite meal is seconds.

All the fat guys watch me and say to their wives, ‘See, there’s a fat guy doing okay. Bring me another beer.’

American baseball player
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