Subject: Characteristics

Murphy was an optimist.

Virtue has its own reward, but no box office.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol

Admiration: Our feeling of delight that another person resembles us.

(1899 – 1995) humorist

Do not free a camel of the burden of his hump; you may be freeing him from being a camel.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist

The last person who quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong – until the next person quits or is fired.

I have such poor vision I can date anybody.

(1949 – 2016) American comedian & television actor

Many people would be more truthful were it not for their uncontrollable desire to talk.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.

(1942 – ) humorist & radio broadcaster

Good hospitality is making your guests feel at home, even when you wish they were.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine

I have nothing but confidence in you, and very little of that.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host

I am a deeply superficial person.

(1928 – 1987) painter, printmaker & filmmaker

An optimist is someone who gets treed by a lion but enjoys the scenery.

(1897 – 1972) broadcast journalist & gossip columnist

The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

If it weren't for marriage, men would spend their lives thinking they had no faults at all.

Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.

I feel very humble; but I think I have the strength of character to fight it.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

Why is it that nobody understands me and everybody likes me?

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist

Americans detest all lies except lies spoken in public or printed lies.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor

If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president

A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet

Poverty is not a disgrace, but it’s terribly inconvenient.

(1908 – 2002) comedian, radio & television actor
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