Subject: Activities (Page 2)

People have asked me a lot of times, because I didn't hit a lot, we all know that, how long a dozen bats would last me?… depending on the weight and the model that I was using at that particular time I would say eight to ten cookouts.

(1935 – ) American baseball player, sportscaster, comedian & actor
Activities Baseball Sports

Today is the first day of the rest of my push-up.

(1951 – ) American author, playwright & lyricist
Activities Exercise

It's better to have loved and lost than do forty pounds of laundry a week.

(1904 – 1989) Spanish surrealist painter
Emotions Housework Love

Smile, it’s the second best thing you can do with your lips.

Activities

You might be a redneck if… you ever won first prize in a tobacco spittin’ contest.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Activities People Rednecks

Smoking is a dying habit.

(1948 – ) British politician
Activities

Snowboarding is an activity that is very popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is lethal enough.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Activities Sports

I went to the store and bought eight apples; the clerk said, “Do you want these in a bag?” I said, “Oh, no, man, I juggle.”

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Activities Situations

Exercise: The joy of flex.

Activities Definitions Exercise

I'm not addicted to cocaine… I just like the way it smells.

(1940 – 2005) comedian & movie actor
Activities Drugs

You know how you're going to die, you just don't know when.

comedian
Activities Death Places

Snake eyes is a gambling term… and an animal term, too.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Activities Animals Games

Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Activities Sex

I certainly do not drink all the time, I have to sleep you know.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink Situations Sleep

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Activities Shopping Things

If women dressed for men, the stores wouldn't sell much – just an occasional sun visor.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Appearance Clothing Men People Shopping Women

I come from Calcutta: in the UK you drive on the left of the road, in Calcutta we drive on what is left of the road.

Indian comedian
Activities Driving Places

I get my exercise from acting as a pallbearer to my friends who exercise.

(1834 – 1928) American attorney for Cornelius Vanderbilt
Activities Death Exercise

I reckoned if my boobs got any lower I would have to buy them their own pair of shoes.

(1959 – ) British novelist
Activities Appearance Body

I was troubled by the presence of a shoe museum because it forced me to ask a very burning question: would my body be able to physically survive the amount of dope I would need to smoke in order to visit a shoe museum?

(1974 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Activities Drugs Situations

They've opened up a new casino for people on welfare; when you put a food stamp in the slot machine and it lands on three babies, you win a block of cheese!

comedian & radio personality
Activities