Subject: Age » Young (Page 2)

I can do some things now that I couldn't do when I was 17, like date high school girls.

(1955 – ) American stand-up comedian
Age Dating Girls People Relationships Young

The idea is to die young as late as possible.

Age Death Murphy’s Laws Time Young

I'm a little kid; I'm gone 12, 13, 14 hours… I don't remember anybody coming looking for me… no Amber Alert goes off.

American comedian
Age Young

Although it is generally known, I think it’s about time to announce that I was born at a very early age.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Age Young

We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Age Children Family Speech Young

Before borrowing from a friend, decide which you need most.

Friends Money People Young

When you feel that you would like to go back to your youth, think of algebra.

Age Old Young

The four stages of a man are infancy, childhood, adolescence and obsolescence.

(1912 – 2010) Canadian-born American radio & television personality & humorist
Age Life Old Young

It is better to waste one’s youth than to do nothing with it at all.

(1858 – 1929) French dramatist, novelist & satirist
Age Young

[My mother] had something like ‘time out;' it was called ‘knock out.'

American comedian
Age Relationships Young

When I was a kid, I had two friends, and they were imaginary and they would only play with each other.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Age Friends People Young

When you've seen a nude infant doing a backward somersault you know why clothing exists.

(1957 – ) English actor, writer, journalist, comedian & film director
Age Appearance Clothing Young

You know your girlfriend is too young when she’ll do everything in bed but go upside down because it’s too scary.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Age Girlfriends Sex Young

When I was little, my grandfather used to make me stand in a closet for five minutes without moving… he said it was elevator practice.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Age Family Things Young

Whatever a parent does is wrong.

Failure Family Murphy’s Laws Parents Problems Young

There are three terrible ages of childhood – 1 to 10, 10 to 20, and 20 to 30.

(1917 – 1998) author, critic, animal rights activist
Age People Young

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Age Alcohol Beer Food/Drink Young

Youth: That brief period, as distinguished from childhood or middle age, when the sexes talk to each other at a party.

Age Definitions People Young

I know we were buddies because he threatened to kill me on no fewer than three occasions, and he did that only to his friends.

(1935) British film director, producer & food critic
Conflict Friends People Young

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Conflict Friends Killing People Young

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.

Age Intelligence Old Young