Subject: Appearance » Body (Page 4)

I'm kinda stuck in that awkward in-between stage where my hair is just starting to fall out, but I'm still maintaining my youthful acne.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian, television writer/producer & radio host

He is so fat… his driver's license says, “picture continued on other side.”

Abdicate: To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I’d look like without plastic surgery.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

Never trust a man with short legs… his brain's too near his bottom.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter

She’s so fat, she’s my two best friends.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

Penis: The male organ used to write one’s name in snow.

He looks like a bag of antlers.

Diana Rigg is built like a brick mausoleum with insufficient flying buttresses.

(1925 – ) American author and literary, theater & film critic

Fat Ladies in Spaaaaace

He was a man of great statue.

Love thy neighbor… and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol

Christians can have big tits, too.

(1921 – 2011) American film actress & sex symbol

It's hard to feel fit as a fiddle when you're shaped like a cello.

American basketball coach & executive

Tattoo: Permanent proof of temporary insanity.

Newman: I’m a little offended, Jerry.

Jerry: You’re not a little anything, Newman.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor

You would think with all the money she saves on food she could buy a dress.

(1967 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor

If you have a pear shaped body, you should not wear pear colored clothes, or act juicy.

(1973 – ) American comedian

My girlfriend has lovely colored eyes; I particularly like the blue one.

Men who can eat anything they want and not gain weight should do it out of sight of women.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer

The quickest way to a man's heart really is through his stomach, because then you don't have to chop through that pesky rib cage.

(1980 – ) cartoonist