Subject: Beliefs (Page 5)

A cynic is a person searching for an honest man, with a stolen lantern.


Beliefs Characteristics Honesty People

Politeness is half good manners and half good lying.

(1880 – ?) American author
Characteristics Lies

I can always tell when a girl comes from a good family because she’s what’s known as “not at all attracted to me.”

American comedian & actor
Beliefs

There hasn’t been a more effeminate Jew in the closet since Anne Frank.

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality
Beliefs Religion

If I’m on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast… if God wants to play through, let him.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
God Golf Sports

I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.

(1884 – 1972) 33rd U.S. president
Beliefs Children

The good Lord never gives you more than you can handle… unless you die of something.

(1935 – ) American cartoonist
Beliefs Death God Life Problems

In high school, I wanted to be a feminist, but my boyfriend wouldn't let me.

comedian
Beliefs People

He's so crooked he uses a corkscrew for a ruler.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Honesty TV/Movie Quotes

I believe in the right to arm bears.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
Beliefs Opinion Wordplay

Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.

(1945 – 2010) American comedian & actor
Characteristics Honesty Intelligence

I like Jesus, but he loves me, so it's awkward.

Canadian comedian
Beliefs Religion

People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Characteristics Opinion People

I want everyone to tell me the truth, even if it costs him his job.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Characteristics Honesty Truth Work

Making a speech on economics is a lot like pissing down your leg; it seems hot to you, but it never does to anyone else.

(1908 – 1973) 36th U.S. president
Beliefs Communication Opinion Speech

Faith is believing what you know ain’t so.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Beliefs

I'm a great lover… I bet.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Beliefs Opinion Sex

My shrink told me it was pointless to believe in myself.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Beliefs Self

I’m not sure I want popular opinion on my side – I’ve noticed those with the most opinions often have the fewest facts.

American activist
Beliefs Opinion

If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer
Activities Beliefs God Travel

If beauty is truth, why don’t women go to the library to have their hair done?

(1805 – 1864) English editor, novelist & sporting writer
Appearance People Truth Women