Subject: Communication (Page 34)

People with narrow minds usually have broad tongues.

Communication Fools Intelligence Proverbs Speech

Why should I talk to you?… I've just been talking to your boss.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Beliefs Communication Death God

Men get laid, but women get screwed.

(1908 – 1999) English writer
Language Men People Sex Women

Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.

(1867 – 1936) author & humorist
Communication Language

When people ask me what sign I was born under, I say "I'm not certain, but it could have been the one that says 'Dining Car in opposite direction'."

(1946 – 1994) writer & humorist
Communication People Self

It was so quiet, you could hear a pun drop.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Communication Language

The amount of flak received on any subject is inversely proportional to the subject’s true value.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

Will you take this woman to be your awful wedded wife?

(1914 – 1953) Welsh-born poet & writer
Communication Marriage Wordplay

If Miss means respectably unmarried, and Mrs. respectably married, then Ms. means nudge, nudge, wink, wink.

(1940 – 1992) English writer
Language Marriage Sex

Economists are still trying to figure out why the girls with the least principle draw the most interest.

Girls People Wordplay

Tact: The ability to describe others as they see themselves.

Communication Definitions

Beware of the conversationalist who adds “in other words;” he is merely starting afresh.

(1890 – 1957) author & journalist
Communication Conversation

If I could drop dead right now, I’d be the happiest man alive.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Death Happiness Misspokements Speech

Architect: One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language Money Things

I never mind my wife having the last word; in fact, I’m delighted when she gets to it.

(1920 – 2000) American actor
Communication Marriage Speech Wives

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language.

(1930 – ) actor, writer, film & television director
Communication Government Language President

It‘s my belief we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer
Communication Language

Novel: A short story padded.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Books Communication

Gentlemen prefer bonds.

(1855 – 1937) American lawyer, judge, banker & Secretary of Treasury
Communication Wordplay

There is no indigestion worse that that which comes from having to eat your own words.

Communication

Nothing travels faster than the speed of light with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws.

(1952 – 2001) English writer, dramatist, & musician
Communication Science/Weather