Subject: Death (Page 8)

I should have asked for a stunt double!

(1929 – 1982) American actor
Last words

The only cure for a real hangover is death.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Alcohol Death Food/Drink Health

Well, now I must go to meet God and try to explain all those men I killed at Alamein.

(1887 – 1976) British Army officer
Last words

Proof that we don’t understand death is that we give dead people a pillow.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Death

Electrocution: Burning at the stake with all modern improvements.

Death Definitions

The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy.

(1900 – 1993) American actress
Age Death

The report of my death was an exaggeration.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Death Exaggerations

It is my last wish to be buried sitting up.

(1908 – 1989) American actress of film, television & theater
Death Situations

Why should I worry about dying; it'’not going to happen in my lifetime!

(1919 – ) American mathematician, logician & magician
Death

Yes… a bullet-proof vest

(1910 – 1960) American robber & convicted murderer
Last words

How could they tell?

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Death Insults

I want that 50 bucks you owe me now, and I mean now.

Carl Switzer (1927 – 1959) American actor
Death Last words

It is nothing… it is nothing…

(1863 – 1914) Archduke of Austria
Last words

Before he died my father told me he never really walked to school without any shoes.

(1966 – 2011) American stand-up comedian
Death Fathers School Situations

I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Alcohol Death Food/Drink Time

I wish I was skiing.
Nurse: Oh, Mr. Laurel, do you ski?
No, but I'd rather be skiing than doing what I'm doing.

(1890 – 1965) English comic actor, writer & director (of Laurel & Hardy)
Last words

They say golf is like life, but don’t believe them; golf is more complicated than that.

(1927 – 1998) American professional golfer
Death Golf Sports

In keeping with Channel 40's policy of bringing you the latest in blood and guts and in living color, you are going to see another first –- attempted suicide.

(1944 – 1974) American television news reporter
Last words

The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Death

You haven’t lived until you’ve died in California.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Death Life Places

Immortality – a fate worse than death.


Death Life