Subject: Food/Drink (Page 9)

How’s about a beer, Norm?

That’s that amber sudsy stuff, right? I’ve heard good things about it.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

A diet is a system of starving yourself to death so you can live a little longer.

(1930 – 1978) American comedian
Food/Drink

The quality of a champagne is judged by the amount of noise the cork makes when it is popped.

Alcohol Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

As life’s pleasures go, food is second only to sex… except for salami and eggs; now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.

(1927 – 2004) American comedian & actor
Eating Food/Drink Life Sex

In Mexico, we have a word for sushi… bait.

(1945 – 2008) American comedian & musician
Definitions Food/Drink Places

Hey I’m high on life, Coach… of course, beer is my life.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer Life TV/Movie Quotes

How do you know when fish goes bad? … it smells like fish either way!

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Food/Drink

I remember when I swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills… my doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Alcohol Health Situations Sleep

They say hot dogs can kill you; how do you know it’s not the bun?

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Food/Drink

Quickly, bring me a beaker of wine, so that I may wet my mind and say something clever.

(450 BC – 388 BC) Greek Athenian comic playwright
Alcohol Food/Drink Speech Wisdom

Alcohol is a good preservative for everything but brains.

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Alcohol Food/Drink Science/Weather

Food consumed standing up always has ten times the calorific intake of food consumed sitting down.

Eating Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

Char: Common method of cooking over a campfire.

Cooking Definitions

The English contribution to world cuisine – the chip.

(1939 – ) English actor, comedian, writer & producer
Cooking England Food/Drink Places

It’s so annoying ‘cause it’s such a portable, good snack, but if you’re a girl and you want to eat a banana all of a sudden you’re in the position of like, how to I de-dick this delicious treat…?

(1978 – ) American stand-up comedian, actress & writer
Food/Drink Sex

A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink

When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink Life Problems

Everybody wants to peel his own banana.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts.

Alcohol Ideas Murphy’s Laws

An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed.

(1904 – 1963) American journalist
America England Food/Drink Places

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight.

America Food/Drink Places