Subject: Government (Page 3)

If you want to succeed in politics, you must keep your conscience well under control.

(1863 – 1945) British politician & statesman
Government Politics

If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire; they're trained for that!

(1964 – ) English comedian
Animals Dogs Government Law

If you really need an officer in a hurry, take a nap.

Military Murphy’s Laws

Military Expert: One who tells you what’s going to happen tomorrow – then tells you why it didn’t.

Definitions Government Military

Votes are like trees, if you are trying to build a forest; if you have more trees than you have forests, then at that point the pollsters will probably say you will win.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Government Misspokements

It’s great that we’ve got a compassionate conservative, but to me, that sounds like a Volvo with a gun rack.

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor
Beliefs Government People

Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Characteristics Law People

Why am I running for president? … Well, my wife… says it is because I sustained several severe blows to the head in prison camp.

(1936 – 2018) U.S. senator (Arizona) and presidential candidate
Elections/Voting Government

Look, we play the Star Spangled Banner before every game; you want us to pay income taxes, too?

(1914 – 1986) American baseball team owner & promoter
Government Taxes

All you need to be the Vice President is a blue suit and a pulse… and Dick Cheney has shown that you don’t even need the pulse.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Government

Bing (Crosby) doesn't pay income tax; he just calls the government and says, 'How much do you boys need?'

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Government Money Taxes Wealth

The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then gets elected and proves it.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Government Politicians

Another such victory, and we are undone.

(318 – 272 BC) Greek general & statesman
Government Military

If God had wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Beliefs Elections/Voting God Government

Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions; conservatives feel they deserve everything they’ve stolen.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Beliefs Government Politics

Frankly, I don’t mind not being president; I just mind that someone else is.

(1932 – 2009) U.S. senator (Massachusetts)
Government President

When the president, during the campaign, said he was against nation building, I didn't realize he meant our nation.

(1951 – ) U.S. senator (Minnesota), political commentator, comedian & writer
Government President

For certain people, after fifty, litigation takes the place of sex.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Age Law Old Sex

The United Nations is a good idea, but it’s a pity they have to have so many foreigners in it.

Government People

People try to live within their income so they can afford to pay taxes to a government that can't live within its income.

businessman
Government Money Taxes

These guys from the nation's capital… now they do a lot of thinking.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Government Intelligence Thinking