Subject: Government (Page 5)

Do you realize we’re only a heart attack away from Bush being president?

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor
Death Government President

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Animals Government Law Lawyers People

It is impossible to tell where the law stops and justice begins.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Government Law

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings… and lawyers.

(1940 – 2005) comedian & movie actor
Emotions Government Law Lawyers Marriage

Talk is cheap – except when Congress does it.

(1923 – ) American quote & quip writer
Communication Congress Frugal Government Money Speech

Today, it takes more brains and effort to make out the income-tax form than it does to make the income.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Government Money Taxes

Judge: A lawyer who once knew a politician.

Definitions Government Law

Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
Government Time

When the weight of the paperwork equals the weight of the plane, the plane will fly.

(1917 – 2004) American industrialist (Douglas Aircraft Company) & sportsman
Government

ear IRS, Please remove me from your mailing list

cartoon character in, Peanuts, by Charles Schulz (1922 – 2000)
Government Taxes

Get re-elected.

Elections/Voting Government Murphy’s Laws

We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Government

The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small.

Clothing Military Murphy’s Laws

The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
America Golf Government People Sports Taxes

Ain’t it funny how many hundreds of thousands of soldiers we can recruit with nerve; but we can’t find one politician in a million with backbone.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Military Politicians

Politicians are wedded to the truth, but like many other married couples they sometimes live apart.

(1870 – 1916) British writer
Government Politicians Truth

Nothing can so alienate a voter from the political system as backing a winning candidate.

American comedian & actor
Government Politics

Assuming either the Left Wing or the Right Wing gained control of the country, it would probably fly around in circles.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
America Government Places Politics

Foundation of a party signals the dissolution of the movement.

Government Murphy’s Laws Politics

A bunch of bong-smoking, America-bashing, flag-burning, yoga-posing, incense-burning, dolphin-saving, salmon-eating hypocrites; these are the sensitive, liberal people who are always yelling about people's freedom of speech and expression, unless you happen to say something that pisses them off.

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
Beliefs Government People Politics

There’s always somebody who is paid too much, and taxed too little – and it’s always somebody else.

(1923 – ) American quote & quip writer
Government Taxes