Subject: People (Page 128)

You leave white people alone in constant isolation for thousands of years, you know what their musical contribution is going to be?… Riverdance.

(1959 – ) American actor, stand-up comedian & television host
Entertainment Music People

I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
People Places Science/Weather World

An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.

(1875 – 1932) English writer
People

The perfect lover is one who turns into a pizza at 4:00 a.m.

(1926 – 1999) actor, comedian & female impersonator
Food/Drink People

I’ve been married to one Marxist and one fascist, and neither one would take the garbage out.

(1927 – ) American actress
Husbands Marriage People

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Animals Cats People

The way things are these days, a girl's gotta play hard to take.

(1905 – 1974) radio comedian
Relationships Situations Women

I’m not only Iranian, I’m also Jewish, and I know what you’re thinking… you’re thinking, ‘Wow, he’s Iranian and Jewish; I don’t know if I should hate him or hate him.’

American standup-comedian
Emotions People Self

The word “lady” most often used to describe someone you wouldn't want to talk to for even five minutes.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
People

The only thing I like about rich people is their money.

(1879 – 1964) British politician
Money People Wealth

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Relationships Self

The littlest things can set women off – like, “Hey, the waitress is hot! I bet we could get her to come home with us.” Or, “How much does your mom weigh? I want to know what I’m getting into.”

(1980 – ) American actor, comedian & musician
People TV/Movie Quotes Women

It's ill-becoming for an old broad to sing about how bad she wants it… but occasionally we do.

(1917 – 2010) American singer & actress
Entertainment People Sex Women

I like my buddies from west Texas; I liked them when I was young; I liked them then I was middle – age; I liked them before I was president; and I like them during president, and I like them after president.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Age Friends People Places President

I set records that will never be equaled; in fact, I hope 90% of them don’t even get printed.

(1935 – ) American baseball player, sportscaster, comedian & actor
Baseball Self Sports

Men love watches with multiple functions; my husband has one that is a combination address book, telescope and piano.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Men People Things

The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her.

writer
Activities People Shopping Women

When you are down and out something always turns up – and it is usually the noses of your friends.

(1915 – 1985) stage & film actor & director
Friends People Situations Young

He had the kind of handshake that ought never to be used except as a tourniquet.

(1922 – ) English comedy writer & television presenter
Characteristics People

In any dealings with a collective body of people, the people will always be more tacky than originally expected.

Murphy’s Laws People

Ingrate: A man who bites the hand that feeds him, and then complains of indigestion.

Definitions People