Subject: Science/Weather (Page 13)

If a thing cannot be fitted into something smaller than itself, some dope will do it.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

The sun has been there for 500, 600 years.

American baseball player
Baseball Science/Weather Sports Time

Barometer: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.

Definitions Science/Weather

Any man that has never seen a baby emerge from another person’s body will walk around for months just going, ‘Oh my God; what else don’t I know about Planet Earth?’

(1955 – ) American actor, stand-up comedian & impressionist
Children Family Science/Weather

Science has always been too dignified to invent a good backscratcher.

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Science/Weather Things

It was so cold… polar bears were buying fur coats.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

The vehicle in front of you is traveling slower than you are.

Autos Driving Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

It's hotter than the hinges on the gates of hell.

Expressions Heat Science/Weather

The reason lightning doesn't strike twice in the same place is that the same place isn’t there the second time.

(1940 – ) American ventriloquist, comedian & actor
Science/Weather

It was so cold today that I saw a dog chasing a cat, and the dog was walking.

professional baseball player
Animals Cold Science/Weather

Brace Yourselves for a Good 12 inches!

Headlines Science/Weather

Smoking is one of leading causes of statistics.

(1911 – 1993) columnist & novelist
Activities Science/Weather

Bad weather reports are more often right than good ones.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

In creating the human brain, evolution has wildly overshot the mark.

(1905 – 1983) Hungarian-British author & journalist
People Science/Weather

The first principle is that you must not fool yourself… and you are the easiest person to fool.

(1918 – 1988) American physicist
People Science/Weather Self

The direction of take-off will be opposite that of the final destination.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

I heard that in relativity theory, space and time are the same thing; Einstein discovered this when he kept showing up three miles late for his meetings.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Science/Weather

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.

(1913 – 1996) Hungarian mathematician
Occupations Science/Weather Work

I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
People Places Science/Weather World

Geography is just physics slowed down, with a couple of trees stuck in it.

(1948 – ) English novelist
Science/Weather

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them.

(1955 – ) magician & showman
Science/Weather