Subject: Science/Weather (Page 14)

Unbeknownst to most historians, Einstein started down the road of professional basketball before an ankle injury diverted him to science.

(1950 – ) American cartoonist The Far Side
People Science/Weather

1. An object in motion will be heading in the wrong direction.
2. An object at rest will be in the wrong place.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Things

It was so cold… flashers were just describing themselves.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

Why are the pictures square if the lens is round?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Science/Weather

It is so hot… potatoes cook underground.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

Cosmologists are often in error, but never in doubt.

(1908 – 1968) Soviet physicist
Occupations Science/Weather Work

The speed of exit of a civil servant is directly proportional to the quality of his service.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Work

I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.

(1957 – ) English actor, writer, journalist, comedian & film director
Animals Science/Weather

It ain't a fit night out for man or beast.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Science/Weather

USA Today has come out with a new survey; apparently, three out of every four people make up 75% of the population.

(1947 – ) comedian & television host
Facts People Science/Weather

Wind: Weather on the go.

Definitions Science/Weather

Free Advice: Bundle Up When Out In the Cold

Cold Headlines

If Al Gore invented the Internet, I invented spell check.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Misspokements Science/Weather

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them.

(1955 – ) magician & showman
Science/Weather

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

Definitions Science/Weather Taxes

The sky is falling… no, I'm tipping over backwards.


Science/Weather Situations

Winter is nature’s way of saying, “Up yours.”

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Science/Weather

I can levitate birds… no one cares.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Animals Science/Weather

Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Clothing Intelligence Science/Weather Understanding

When I took office, only high energy physicists had ever heard of what is called the Worldwide Web…. Now even my cat has its own page.

Animals Cats Science/Weather Time

Cancun Temps Plunge to 100-Year Record Low During ‘Global Warming’ Summit!

Headlines Science/Weather