Subject: Science/Weather (Page 3)

Winter is nature’s way of saying, “Up yours.”

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Science/Weather

There is no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather.

(1819 – 1900) English art critic, social thinker, poet & artist
Science/Weather

I am an expert of electricity; my father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Science/Weather

In Alaska, we have just two seasons — this winter and next winter.

(1897 – 1991) American Air Force General
Places Science/Weather

It was so cold… when we milked the cows, we got ice cream.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

Science Fiction: Fairy tales for nerds.

Communication Definitions Science/Weather

What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Science/Weather

How do you write zero in Roman numerals?

Science/Weather

It’s absolutely stupid that we live without an ozone layer; we have men, we’ve got rockets, we’ve got Saran Wrap – FIX IT!

Problems Science/Weather

It is so hot… the birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

I have the oldest typewriter in the world; it types in pencil.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Science/Weather Things

It is so dry… I caught a catfish that had ticks on him.

Exaggerations Science/Weather

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks grey?

(1973 – ) American comedian
Animals Science/Weather

Canada is a country whose main exports are hockey players and cold fronts; our main imports are baseball players and acid rain.

(1919 – 2000) Canadian prime minister & politician
Canada Hockey Places Science/Weather Sports

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
America Places Science/Weather

In India, ‘cold weather’ is merely a conventional phrase and has come into use through the necessity of having some way to distinguish between weather which will melt a brass door knob and weather which only makes it mushy.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Heat Science/Weather

Large Celestial Object Stuns Astronomers

Headlines Science/Weather

Everything else causes cancer in rats.

Animals Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

It is so hot… today I saw a funeral procession pull into a Dairy Queen.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

Bad weather always looks worse through a window.

(1928 – ) humorist, singer, songwriter & satirist
Science/Weather

The earth is bipolar.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Places Science/Weather