Subject: Science/Weather (Page 9)

I put tape on the mirrors in my house, so that I won’t accidentally walk through another dimension.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Science/Weather Situations

What Orwell failed to predict was that we’d buy the cameras ourselves… and that our biggest fear would be that nobody was watching.

Future Science/Weather Time

Every scientific truth goes through three states: first, people say it conflicts with the Bible; next, they say it has been discovered before; lastly, they say they always believed it.

(1807 – 1873) paleontologist, glaciologist & geologist
Beliefs Facts Science/Weather

If the facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of.

Facts Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

Enzymes are things invented by biologists that explain things which otherwise require harder thinking.

(1920 – 2011) American scientist & professor
Science/Weather

Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions.

Definitions Science/Weather

In Seattle, they have a saying: 'If you don't like the weather, wait five minutes and then shoot yourself in the face.'

(1964 – ) American stand-up comedian
Places Science/Weather

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one’s hat keeps blowing off.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Clothing Science/Weather

You might be a redneck if… you think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three primary colors.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Science/Weather

I don’t know why my brain has kept all the words to the Gilligan’s Island theme song and has deleted everything about triangles.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Intelligence Mind Science/Weather

Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
People Science/Weather

It's a good thing we have gravity, or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there; hunters would be all confused.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Animals Science/Weather

I ran into Isosceles; he has a great idea for a new triangle!

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Science/Weather

If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of 22, it would have changed the history of music… and of aviation.

(1937 – ) British playwright & screenwriter
Entertainment Music Science/Weather

It was so cold… we had lunch at the "Greasy Spoon" – just for the heartburn.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

I shop at a computer store called 'Your Crap's Already Obsolete.'

(1953 – ) American comedian & writer
Science/Weather

My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
People Science/Weather

Anything, no matter how bad, will sound good if played at a very high volume for a short time.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

Smoking is one of leading causes of statistics.

(1911 – 1993) columnist & novelist
Activities Science/Weather

Science Fiction: Fairy tales for nerds.

Communication Definitions Science/Weather

Trees that grow in smoggy cities are needed to make carbon paper.

comedian
Science/Weather