Subject: Work (Page 12)

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

Housework Work

A professional is a man who can do his job when he doesn’t feel like it; an amateur is a man who can’t do his job when he does feel like it.

(1877 – 1947) British diarist & critic
Work

If a job’s worth doing, make sure you delegate it to the right person.

Work

Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell, and advertise.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
Sleep Work

There are two essential rules of management:
One: the customer is always right.
Two: they must be punished for their arrogance.

(1957 – ) cartoonist (Dilbert)
Work

No real English gentleman, in his secret soul, was ever sorry for the death of a political economist.

(1826 – 1877) English economist & journalist
Occupations Work

A censor has the peculiar faculty of banning just what we want to hear, see,

Occupations Work

I have long been of the opinion that if work were such a splendid thing the rich would have kept more of it for themselves.

(1940 – ) English politician
Work

We’re all endowed with God-given talents… mine happens to be hitting people in the head.

American boxing champion
Boxing Occupations Sports

You cannot get to the top by sitting on your bottom.

Proverbs Work

When properly administered, vacations do not diminish productivity: for every week you're away and get nothing done, there's another week when your boss is away and you get twice as much done.

Murphy’s Laws Work

Ambassador: An honest man sent abroad to lie for the good of his country.

(1568 – 1639) English author, diplomat & politician
Government Occupations

Boss: A person who comes early to see who comes late.

Definitions Work

A high paying rush job comes in only after you've committed to a low paying rush job.

Money Murphy’s Laws Work

In California everyone goes to a therapist, is a therapist , or is a therapist going to a therapist.

(1924 – 1984) American author
Occupations People Places Work

We are paid to have dirty minds.

(1903 – 1986) American film censor
Entertainment Film Occupations Work

[Critics] search for ages for the wrong word, which, to give them credit, they eventually find.

(1921 – 2004) English actor & author
Communication Occupations Work

If you're gonna be late, then be late and not just 2 minutes – make it an hour and enjoy your breakfast.

(1961 – ) English comedian, actor, director, producer & writer
Time TV/Movie Quotes Work

“Pickup artists” and “garbagemen” should switch names.

Occupations Wordplay Work

Authority tends to assign jobs to those least able to do them.

Murphy’s Laws People Work

Stress is your body's way of saying you haven't worked enough unpaid overtime.

(1957 – ) cartoonist (Dilbert)
Body Characteristics Money Work