Author: Anonymous Page 160

Epigram: A half-truth so stated to irritate the person who believes the other half.

Definitions

He’s so lazy he wouldn’t work in a pie factory.

Characteristics Expressions Work

Adolescence: The age between puberty and adultery.

Age Definitions Sex

Kiss: What the child gets free, the young man steals, and the old man buys.

Definitions

“This is mutiny!” said Tom bountifully.

Tom Swifties

Please excuse Timmy from school Friday. He has very loose vowels.

Health Malaprops

Forty: The most difficult age for a woman to pass; it often takes years.

Age Definitions

Don’t eat with your mouth full!

Mixed metaphors

Nun: A creature of habit.

Definitions Religion

The head of the body overseeing youth justice…

Mixed metaphors

Counterfeiter: A guy who gets into trouble by following a good example.

Definitions

“I work at a bank,” said Tom tellingly.

Tom Swifties

Flirt: A girl who got the boy you wanted.

Definitions

If you know you don't know much, you are smarter than most people.

Intelligence

From now on, I’m watching everything you do with a fine-tuned comb.

Mixed metaphors

We all act as one heartbeat.

Mixed metaphors

Kids in back seats cause accidents, accidents in back seats cause kids.

Children Family Sex Wordplay

I want to see you go to town like a house of fire.

Mixed metaphors

Nice Girl: One who whispers sweet nothing-doings in your ear.

Definitions

So there was this dyslexic guy who walked into a bra.

Health

Woman: A creature who is either making a fool out of man, or making a man out of a fool.

Definitions People