Author: Will Rogers Page 2

I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Age Appearance Body Old

The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
America Golf Government People Sports Taxes

Liberty doesn't work as good in practice as it does in speeches.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Politicians

All you need to grow fine, vigorous grass is a crack in your sidewalk.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Situations

The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Congress Death Government Taxes

Calvin Coolidge didn’t say much, and when he did, he didn’t say much.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Communication Insults Intelligence Speech

Statistics have proven that the surest way to get anything out of the public mind and never hear of it again is to have a Senate Committee appointed to look into it.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Congress Government

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Characteristics

My ancestors didn't come over on the Mayflower, but they were there to meet the boat.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
History People Things Time

Once a man wants to hold a public office, he is absolutely no good for honest work.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Occupations Politicians Work

Nothing you can’t spell will ever work.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Problems

If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn’t be any inducement to go to heaven.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government

You never know how much a man can't remember until he is called as a witness.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Individuals Intelligence Memory People

With Congress, every time they make a joke it’s a law, and every time they make a law it’s a joke.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Congress Emotions Government

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Communication Speech

Whenever I feel the need for exercise I go and lie down for half an hour until the feeling passes.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Activities Exercise

Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Animals Situations

I belong to no organized party… I am a Democrat.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Politicians Politics Relationships

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft; today it’s called golf.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Golf Sports

I can remember way back when a liberal was one who was generous with his own money.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Politicians

When you put down the good things you ought to have done, and leave out the bad ones you did do – well, that's Memoirs.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Characteristics Past Reading/Writing Self