Subject: Intelligence

I'm concentrating so much I don't know what I'm doing half the time.

British boxer

People with narrow minds usually have broad tongues.

If brains were all that important in a beauty contest, you could enter wearing a Hefty Bag.

(1946 – 1994) writer & humorist

There must be a happy medium somewhere between being totally informed and blissfully unaware.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist

I once said Gazza's [Paul Gascoigne] IQ was less than his shirt number and he asked me: "What's an IQ?"

(1946 – 2005) Irish professional football player

Everyone is born with genius, but most people only keep it a few minutes.

(1883 – 1965) French-born composer

Only someone who understands something absolutely can explain it so no one else can understand it.

There are three side effects of acid; enhanced long term memory, decreased short term memory… and I forget the third.


American scientific companies are cross-breeding humans and animals and coming up with mice with fully functioning human brains.

(1969 – ) U.S. Representative (Delaware)

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

Nothing is more responsible for the good old days than a bad memory.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist

[George W.] Bush doesn’t know the names of countries, he doesn’t know the names of foreign leaders, he can’t even find the Earth on a globe.

(1956 – ) American comedian

People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)

It’s easy to identify people who can’t count to ten; they’re in front of you in the supermarket express lane.

The trouble with ignorance is that it picks up confidence as it goes along.

Any theory can be made to fit any facts by means of appropriate additional assumptions.

The only way to reduce the number of nuclear weapons is to use them.

(1951 – ) American conservative radio talk-show host

Necessity is the mother of taking chances.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist

If you don't think too good, don't think too much.

(1918 – 2002) American baseball player

He is so dumb, blondes tell jokes about him.

An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less.

(1862 – 1947) American educator
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