Subject: Situations

Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.

We are confronted with insurmountable opportunities.

(1913 – 1973) American animator & cartoonist (Pogo)

I bought a new pair of pajamas with pockets, which is great, cause now i don’t have to hold things when I sleep.

(1973 – ) American comedian

It looks like we’re up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick!

cartoon character in Shrek 2 (Conrad Vernon)

Nothing makes you more tolerant of a neighbor's noisy party than being there.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist

The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet

Don’t ever take a fence down until you know the reason why it was put up.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist

I want to commit a crime during a reenactment, and turn it into an enactment.

(1973 – ) American comedian

I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die; I would have thought the obvious one was shout for help.

(1980 – ) English comedian & novelist

… just to relieve the monopoly.

If you are going through hell… keep going.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator

Gimme:  An agreement between two losers who can't putt.

(1907 – 1987) American journalist & author

If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist

The incidence of anything worthwhile is either 15-25 percent or 80-90 percent.

When you pass the buck, don't ask for change.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author

It matters not whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose.

By the time they had diminished from 50 to 8, the other dwarves began to suspect “Hungry.”

(1950 – ) American cartoonist The Far Side

I have no sex appeal; if my husband didn’t toss and turn, we’d never have had the kid.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

Never accept a ride from a stranger unless he gives you candy.


Don't corner something that is meaner than you.

In any decision situation, the amount of relevant information available is inversely proportional to the importance of the decision.

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