Subject: Age (Page 21)

When I broke in, they didn’t have bats – we just grabbed the branch of a tree.

American baseball pitcher
Age Baseball Sports

It was tough growing up in Florida because all my friends were retired.

(1959 – ) American comedian, comedy writer, actor & author
Age Friends Old People Places Young

We have a beautiful little girl who we named after my mom; in fact Passive Aggressive Psycho turns five tomorrow.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Children Family Mothers Old

Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the National Debt.

(1929 – 1933) 31st U.S. president, humanitarian
Age Government Money Young

Retire? … I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Age Entertainment Old Work

Geriatricide joint

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Age Malaprops Old

When you are about 35 years old, something terrible always happens to music.

(1921 – 2009) British composer, pianist and radio & television presenter
Age Entertainment Music

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.

Age Intelligence Old Young

While you can only be young once, you can always be immature.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Age Young

You know you’re getting old when you buy a sexy sheer nightgown and don’t know anyone who can see through it.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Age Old

At my age, an affair of the heart is a bypass.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Age Health Old Relationships

I can do some things now that I couldn't do when I was 17, like date high school girls.

(1955 – ) American stand-up comedian
Age Dating Girls People Relationships Young

I didn’t see it [old age] coming — it hit me from the rear.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Age Old

I know we were buddies because he threatened to kill me on no fewer than three occasions, and he did that only to his friends.

(1935) British film director, producer & food critic
Conflict Friends People Young

Old Age: When you don’t recognize either the host or the musical guest on Saturday Night Live.

Age Definitions

I've dated men my age, younger than me and older and the only difference is the young ones are quicker at taking out the garbage.

(1970 – ) American film & television actress
Age Dating Old Relationships Young

Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Age Appearance Body Clothing Old

Middle age is when your broad mind and narrow waist begin to change places.

American entrepreneur & author
Age

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.

Age Life Old

She was old too, when she went to school they didn’t have history.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Age Education History Old School Time

Old Age: When you wink at a girl and she says, “Something wrong with your eyes?”

Age Definitions