Subject: Age (Page 8)

You're an old-timer if you can remember when setting the world on fire was a figure of speech.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Age Communication Language Old Speech World

Adolescence: That period when children feel their parents should be told the facts of life.

Age Definitions

I watched Ken Burns' Civil War series on PBS… my favorite segment is when Bob Hope entertains the troops at Gettysburg.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Age Old People

I don’t look older, I just look worse.

(1982 – ) American comedian, actor, writer & producer
Age Appearance Body Old

The comfort of turning 49 is the realization that you are now too old to die young.

Age Death Murphy’s Laws Old

When childhood dies, its corpses are called adults and they enter society, one of the politer names of hell.

(1925 – ) English writer & editor
Age Young

I’m getting pretty worried; my girlfriend hasn’t gotten her period… and she’s already 14.

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Age Girlfriends People

He is so old… I told him to act his own age, and he died.

Age Exaggerations Old

Age is a high price to pay for maturity.

(1937 – ) British playwright & screenwriter
Age

True friends stab you in the front.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Conflict Friends Old People

Nothing makes a smoker happier than to see an old person smoking.

(1961 – 1994) comedian
Activities Age Happiness Health Old

I knew her before she was a virgin.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Age Old

You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Age Health Old Science/Weather

You still chase women, but only downhill.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Dating Old

Barney: I think of you as experienced. In an emergency, you would be the first one that I’d call.
Fish: You should call me first. I need time to put my teeth in.

(1921 – ) American actor
Age Old TV/Movie Quotes

Zeal: A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Definitions Young

Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the National Debt.

(1929 – 1933) 31st U.S. president, humanitarian
Age Government Money Young

If I knew I was going to live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself.

(1931 – 1995) American baseball player
Age Health Old

Your best friends are those who speak well of you behind your back.

(1920 – 2001) American writer & humorist
Age Friends People

Adult: One who has ceased to grow vertically, but not horizontally.

writer
Age Appearance Body People

I'm a little kid; I'm gone 12, 13, 14 hours… I don't remember anybody coming looking for me… no Amber Alert goes off.

American comedian
Age Young