Subject: Appearance » Fat

Elizabeth Taylor is wearing Orson Welles designer jeans.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

He is so fat… when he ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.

Is she fat? … Her favorite food is seconds.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

She is so fat… she can't even jump to conclusions.

He is so fat… when he gets his shoes shined he has to take the man's word for it.

Nowadays, a balanced diet is when every McNugget weighs the same!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine

You want to have a little fun, go to a fashion show and throw a cookie on stage and watch them.

(1961 – ) American actor & comedian

When you’re a fat kid, you only get to be two things… funny and goalie.

(1980 – ) Canadian writer, comedian & political activist

She is so fat… when she was a kid she could only play seek.

I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

I ain’t afraid to die fat… that’s my pallbearers’ worry.


If you're going to dedicate your career to ranting about the excesses of American capitalism, you probably shouldn't weigh 450 pounds.

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality

I burned 60 calories… that should take care of the peanut I ate in 1962.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer

Why doesn’t the fattest man in the world become a hockey goalie?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer

If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.

(1946 – 1994) writer & humorist

A waist is a terrible thing to mind.

She is so fat… when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back party.

Smoking cures weight problems… eventually.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer

I don’t know why I should even bother to eat this. I should just apply it directly to my hips.

(1939 – ) American actress

If you can’t tell the difference between a spoon and a ladle, then you’re fat.

(1973 – ) American comedian