Subject: Communication (Page 64)

Before the invention of the alphabet, filing was impossible… or very easy.

(1972 – ) English standup comedian, writer & actor
Communication Language

I got a new job stitching shoes; it was so-so.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Occupations Work

When you win, say nothing; when you lose, say less.

professional football coach
Communication Speech Sports

Just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome; it started off badly, but by the end I really liked it.

(1927 – 2018) British comedian, singer & songwriter
Books Communication Reading/Writing Wordplay

I think that people who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Communication Lies Reading/Writing

To eat is human, to digest, divine.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Eating Food/Drink Wordplay

If writers were good businessmen, they'd have too much sense to be writers.

(1876 – 1944) American author, humorist & columnist
Communication Money Reading/Writing

I keep reading between the lies.

(Aiskowitz) (1899 – 1982) humorist
Characteristics Language Lies Truth

The less you say, the less you have to take back.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech

The Romans would never have found time to conquer the world if they had been obliged first to learn Latin.

(1797 – 1856) German critic & poet
Communication Education Language Learning Places

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Animals Language

Journalism is literature in a hurry.

(1822 – 1888) English writer
Communication Reading/Writing

She went into the hospital after being bitten by a spider in a bathing suit.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Language Misspokements

No name, no matter how simple, can be correctly understood over the phone.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Things

Democracy consists of choosing your dictators, after they’ve told you what you think it is you want to hear.

(1938 – 2007) British writer
Communication Democracy Government

Having something to say is overrated.

American writer
Beliefs Communication Opinion

Where there's a will, there's an inheritance tax.

Death Government Language Taxes

What do people mean when they say the computer went down on me?

comedian, commentator, radio host, reporter & writer
Computers Language Sex Things

I wasn’t allowed to speak while my husband was alive, and since he’s gone no one has been able to shut me up.

(1885 – 1966) American actress & gossip columnist
Communication Speech

Is "tired old cliche" one?


Communication Language

A stupid man's report of what a clever man says is never accurate because he unconsciously translates what he hears into something he can understand.

(1872 – 1970) British philosopher, mathematician, historian & social critic
Communication Intelligence Stupidity Wisdom