Subject: Food/Drink » Alcohol (Page 4)

I don’t have a drinking problem, except when I can’t get a drink.

(1949 – ) American singer-songwriter, composer & actor
Alcohol Food/Drink

Never program and drink beer at the same time.

Alcohol Beer Computers Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Things

I’m so holy that when I touch wine, it turns into water.

(1877 – 1957) 48th Imam of the Nizari Ismaili community & [founder &] president of the All-India Muslim League
Alcohol Food/Drink

Zigzag: The shortest distance between two drinks.

Alcohol Definitions Food/Drink

They were persecuted at the turn of the century by the U.S. government – that's right: Prohibition.

comedian, television writer
Alcohol Food/Drink People

I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Alcohol Food/Drink

He is not drunk, who from the floor, can rise and stand and shout for more.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Alcohol Food/Drink

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Alcohol Food/Drink Work

A man shouldn’t fool with booze until he’s fifty; then he’s a damn fool if he doesn’t.

(1897-1962) American writer
Alcohol Food/Drink

One more drink and I'd be under the host.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Alcohol Food/Drink

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Age Alcohol Beer Food/Drink Young

Patsy: What will you drink if you stop drinking?
Edina: I shall drink water.
Patsy: [Blank look]
Edina: It’s a mixer, Patsy, we have it with whisky.

(1958 – ) English comedian, screenwriter & actress
Alcohol Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

Abstainer: The kind of man you wouldn’t want to drink with even if he did.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor
Alcohol Food/Drink People

There are two rules for drinking whisky: first, never take whisky without water, and second, never take water without whisky.

(1919 – 1985) Scottish comedian & actor
Alcohol Food/Drink

One reason I don't drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time.

(1879 – 1964) British politician
Alcohol Emotions Food/Drink Happiness

I had two martinis New Years Eve and I tried to hijack an elevator and fly it to Cuba.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Alcohol Food/Drink

He’s so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he’d burn for three days.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Alcohol Food/Drink

I once donated a pint of my finest red corpuscles to the great American Red Cross and the doctor opined my blood was very helpful; contained so much alcohol they could use it to sterilize their instruments.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink

Put it back in the horse!

(1907 – 1976) American journalist & humorist
Alcohol Beer Food/Drink Insults

An Irishman is not drunk as long as he still has a blade of grass to hang onto.

Alcohol Food/Drink People