Subject: Government (Page 33)

A conservative is someone who makes no changes and consults his grandmother when in doubt.

(1856 – 1924) 28th U.S. president & politician
Beliefs Government Politicians

Master of the Rolls: Really, Mr Smith, do give this Court credit for some little intelligence.

Smith: That is the mistake I made in the Court below, My Lord.

(1872 – 1930) British statesman, politician & lawyer
Government Law

Many of these guys on death row have done heinous things, but when we as a people sink to their level and execute them, then we’re no better than Republicans.

American comedian & writer
Death Government Politicians

A triumph for democracy; it proves that a millionaire has just as good a chance as anybody else.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Elections/Voting Government Money

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
America Intelligence Language Military Places

Armies aren't known for neatness.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
Government Military

When you have women in that situation [the military] it just creates a whole new set of dynamics which are distracting to training these men to kill or be killed.

(1969 – ) U.S. Representative (Delaware)
Government Military Misspokements People Women

90% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

Government Law Lawyers

The mistakes made by Congress wouldn't be so bad if the next Congress didn't keep trying to correct them.

(1923 – ) American quote & quip writer
Congress Government Mistakes Problems

Political satire became obsolete when Henry Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.

(1928 – ) humorist, singer, songwriter & satirist
Communication Government Politics

I can make more generals, but horses cost money.

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president
Animals Government Military Money

The Tomb of the Well-Known Soldier.

(1905 – 1987) Welsh dramatist & actor
Government

Absolute power corrupts absolutely.

(1834 – 1902) English Catholic historian, politician, & writer
Characteristics Government

We have the greatest democracy in the world; of course, you don't have to win the election to become president, but don't nitpick this to death, alright?

(1953 – ) American comedian & writer
Democracy Elections/Voting Government President

An Iranian moderate is one that has run out of ammunition.

(1923 – ) German-born diplomat & scholar
Arms Conflict Government People Places

Lawyers are operators of the toll bridge which anyone in search of justice must pass.

(1939 – ) American financial journalist
Lawyers Occupations

The price of any product produced for a government agency will be not less than the square of the initial Firm Fixed-Price Contract.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

Definitions Science/Weather Taxes

If you laid all our laws end to end, there would be no end.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Government Law

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President.

(1908 – 1973) 36th U.S. president
Golf Government Politics President Sports

I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Government Intelligence President