Subject: Government » Politicians (Page 3)

The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor

Liberty doesn't work as good in practice as it does in speeches.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

There is one sure way of telling when politicians aren't telling the truth — their lips move.

(1946 – ) English actress

History buffs probably noted the reunion at a Washington party a few weeks ago of three ex-presidents: Carter, Ford, and Nixon – See No Evil, Hear No Evil, and Evil.

(1923 – ) U.S. senator (Kansas) & presidential candidate

The reason there are so few female politicians is that it’s too much trouble putting make-up on two faces.

Australian comedian & actress

I won’t eat anything that has intelligent life, but I’d gladly eat a network executive or a politician.

(1934 – 1982) English writer, comedian & actor

Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor.

(1912 – 2007) U.S. first lady, wife of Lyndon Johnson

If the law-makers make a compromise, the place where it will be felt most is the taxpayer’s pocket.

The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then gets elected and proves it.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist

A candidate could easily commit political suicide if he were to come up with an unconventional thought during a presidential tour.

(1899 – 1985) US author & humorist

Foot: A politician’s pacifier.

The mistake a lot of politicians make is forgetting they’ve been appointed and thinking they’ve been anointed.

(1900 – 1989) American politician

Mondale’s Offensive Looks Hard to Beat

Democrats Are Sexy. Who Ever Heard of Good Piece of Elephant.

The politician is an acrobat; he keeps his balance by doing the opposite of what he says.

(1862 – 1923) French writer & politician

A bureaucrat is a Democrat who holds some office that a Republican wants.

(1877 – 1956) U.S. vice president & politician

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post "Thou shalt not steal," "Thou shalt not commit adultery," and "Thou shalt not lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author

The Senate seems like the place where smart people go to die.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian

The news of any politician’s death should be listed under ”Public Improvements.”

(1902 – 1963) Danish actor

Science Confirms: Politicians Lie