Subject: Life (Page 12)

I intend to live forever – so far, so good.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer

Life is just one damned thing after another.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher

Live each day as if it were your last… because one day, you’ll be right.

(1924 – 1992) English comedian & actor

I do benefits for all religions – I’d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

If God were suddenly condemned to live the life which he has inflicted on men, he would kill himself.

(1824 – 1895) French writer

Life is uncertain… eat dessert first.

(1925 – ) American writer

It is better to live rich than to die rich.

(1709 – 1784) English author, essayist, critic, editor & lexicographer

Anyone who lives within his means suffers from a lack of imagination.

(1908 – 1994) American actor

Have fun; and go home when you’re tired.

(1887 – 1995) American theater produce, director & playwright, screenwriter & film director

When you're born, you have a finger up your nose, the other hand on your dick, and you get taller; and that is really it.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer

One of the strangest things about life is that the poor, who need money the most, are the very ones who never have it.

(1867 – 1936) author & humorist

Dying is no big deal, living is the trick.

(1905–1982) American sportswriter

I've got to get out of this rut and back in the groove.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

Some mornings, it’s just not worth chewing through the leather straps.

(1956 – ) American comedian

Everything is in a state of utter dishevelment.

If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.

(1925 – 2005) television host

It is not the years in your life that count, it is the life in your years.

(1900 – 1965) diplomat & Democratic politician

We’ve been through so much together, and most of it was your fault.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist

If I was doin’ any better, I’d have ta hire somebody to help me enjoy it!

I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.