Subject: Life (Page 14)

It’s a topsy-turvy world, and maybe the problems of two people don’t amount to a hill of beans; but this is our hill… and these are our beans!

(1926 – 2010) Canadian actor

Life is too short to drink cheap beer.

That's the secret to life… replace one worry with another.

cartoon character, Peanuts, Charles Schulz (1922 – 2000) cartoonist

For fast-acting relief, try slowing down.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer

All the rudiments of success in life can be found in ironing a pair of trousers.

British boxing champion

Life is uncertain… eat dessert first.

(1925 – ) American writer

Live each day as if it were your last… because one day, you’ll be right.

(1924 – 1992) English comedian & actor

Life is not for everyone.

(1940 – 1994) American writer & performer

Threescore years and ten is enough; if a man can’t suffer all the misery he wants in that time, he must be numb.

(1818 – 1885) humorist

Well, you’ve got to take the bitter with the better.

(1905 – 1974) radio comedian

I had everything a kid could want: two square meals a day, a basket to sleep in, and an imaginary dog.

(1949 – ) American co-host of radio show “Car Talk”

Life starts out with everyone clapping when you take a poo and goes downhill from there.

(1978 – ) American writer

I’ve developed a new philosophy… I’m only going to dread one day at a time.

cartoon character, Peanuts, Charles Schulz (1922 – 2000) cartoonist

When opportunity knocks, you’ve got headphones on.

Life doesn’t imitate art, it imitates bad television.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

Life: A continuous series of disasters which result in one’s death.

For one brief moment today I thought I was winning in the game of life… but there was a flag on the play!

cartoon character, Peanuts, Charles Schulz (1922 – 2000) cartoonist

Make Life Your Bitch

Life: A play with a lousy third act.

If I had my life to live over, I’d live it over a deli.

(1926 – 2009) comedian, actor, radio – TV personality & host

Maybe it would have been better if neither of us had been born.

(1769 – 1821) French general & politician