Subject: People (Page 126)

If Howard Cosell were a sport, he'd be roller derby.

(1909 – 1973) American sports journalist
People

Hermits have no peer pressure.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
People

Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Marriage Men Women

A man can be called ruthless if he bombs a country to oblivion; a woman can be called ruthless if she puts you on hold.

(1934 – ) American feminist, journalist, & social & political activist
Characteristics Men People Women

The biggest difference between the psychiatrist and the patient is that the psychiatrist has learned how to live with it.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
Doctors Health Life People

What would bug a guy from the Taliban more than seeing a gay woman in a suit surrounded by Jews?

(1958 – ) comedian, actress & television host
People Self

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.

(1953 – ) comedian & actor
Autos People Things Women

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Emotions Things Women

The problem with the common person is that he is so unbearably common!

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
People

Adolescents: People who never seem to realize that one day they will be as dumb as their parents.

Age People Young

Eighty percent of all people consider themselves to be above average drivers.

Beliefs Driving Murphy’s Laws Opinion People

Women… can’t live with ‘em… pass the beer nuts.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes Women

Men are animals and as such are entitled to human treatment and should not be trapped or shot or bred for food or fur.


Men People

When I was kidnapped my parents snapped into action… they rented out my room.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Family Parents Self Situations

When I answer the door the kids hand ME candy.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Self Situations Ugly

My ancestors didn't come over on the Mayflower, but they were there to meet the boat.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
History People Things Time

A hard man is good to find.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Men Sex Situations

I had an unemployed dwarf do a bit of casual work for me; he asked to be paid under the table.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
People

The Irish people do not gladly suffer common sense.

(1878 – 1957) Irish poet, author, athlete & politician
Intelligence People Places

Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote the book or even what book.

Murphy’s Laws People

The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Men People