Subject: People (Page 5)

If I were married to her, I’d be sure to have dinner ready when she got home.

(1920 – ) American economist, statesman & businessman
Characteristics People

In order to make a man or boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to attain.

Characteristics Men People Situations

A person who knows how to laugh at himself will never ceased to be amused.

(1934 – ) American actress, dancer, activist & author
Emotions Laughter People Self

There's always something fishy about the French.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Insults People Places

A missionary is a person who teaches cannibals to say grace before they him.

People

Barack Obama's approval ratings are so low there is talk of replacing him with Jay Leno.

(1961 – ) American stand-up comedian
Opinion People

Prejudiced people are all alike.

Characteristics People

White babies are disgusting… they’re like regular babies that aren’t ripe yet.

(1983 – ) American comedian & actor
Family People

I think we can all agree that sleeping around is a great way to meet people.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian, television host, actress, & author
People Sex

There are two distinctive classes of people today, those who have personal computers, and those who have several thousand extra dollars apiece.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Computers Money People Things

Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary.

People Women

Personally, I think that if a woman hasn’t met the right man by the time she’s twenty-four, she may be lucky.

(1921 – 2007) Scottish-born actress
Men People Relationships Women

I like my coffee like I like my women… in a plastic cup.

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor
People Women

The man has a 70% approval rate, which makes sense to me because he's pretty much done everything I expected him to do: the economy's in the toilet, we're at war and everything's on fire.

(1964 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actress, television host
People Problems

Where ignorance is bliss it's foolish to borrow your neighbor's newspaper.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Intelligence People Reading/Writing Stupidity

He’s an animal lover… people he don’t like so much.

(1937 – ) British playwright & screenwriter
People

Deploring change is the unchangeable habit of all Englishmen.

(1896 – 1971) English socialist, author, journalist, editor & gourmet
People Situations

Man has his will, but woman has her way.

(1809 – 1894) physician, professor, lecturer & author
Men People Women

Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Intelligence People Wisdom

Discriminate: To note the particulars in which one person or thing is, if possible, more objectionable than another.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language People

You might be a redneck if… your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Wives