Subject: People » Women (Page 18)

Old ladies in wheelchairs with blankets over their legs, I don’t think so… retired mermaids.

(1964 – ) English comedian
Age Old People Women

High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead.

(1890 – 1957) author & journalist
Appearance Body Clothing Women

When a woman tries on clothing from her closet that feels tight, she will assume she has gained weight; when a man tries something from his closet that feels tight, he will assume the clothing has shrunk.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Appearance Body Fat Men People Women

A man's face is his autobiography; a woman's face is her work of fiction.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Appearance Men People Women

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

(1907 – 1988) science fiction author
Animals Cats People Women

I took this girl to dinner, and I heard that women like it when you order for them, so I was like, 'I'll have the special, and she's not getting anything tonight.'

(1981 – ) American comedian, writer & actor
Food/Drink People Situations Women

Women were brought up to believe that men were the answer; they weren’t… they weren’t even one of the questions.

(1946 – ) English writer
Men People Women

Women… if they're not turning down your proposals for marriage, they're accusing you of suspicious behavior in the women's lingerie changing room.

(1947 – ) American actor & entrepreneur
TV/Movie Quotes Women

To please a woman in bed, all a man has to do is a poetry course; they also have to learn that the Kama Sutra is not an Indian takeaway and that the mutual orgasm is not an insurance company.

(1958 – ) Australian author
People Sex Women

Women… can’t live with ‘em… pass the beer nuts.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes Women

Men and women are different; while guy is having sex he's thinking how great it would be with a different woman; while when a woman is having sex she's thinking how lousy it is with this guy.

Canadian comedian & author
Men People Sex Women

Many a necklace becomes a noose.

(1888 – 1982) American writer
Dating Marriage Men People Relationships Women

When I meet a beautiful girl, the first thing I say is 'will you marry me? … the second thing I say is, 'how do you do?”

(1894 – 1967) English heir, New York socialite (married 13 times)
Marriage People Women

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Appearance Body Fat People Women

I believe in loyalty… when a woman reaches an age she likes, she should stick with it.

(1919 – 1995) Hungarian-born American socialite & actress
Age Old People Women

To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Characteristics Friends Old People Women

Taste: (female Interpretation): Something you do frequently to whatever you’re cooking, to make sure it’s good;   (male Interpretation): Something you must do to anything you think has gone bad, prior to tossing it out.

Definitions Men People Women

The littlest things can set women off – like, “Hey, the waitress is hot! I bet we could get her to come home with us.” Or, “How much does your mom weigh? I want to know what I’m getting into.”

(1980 – ) American actor, comedian & musician
People TV/Movie Quotes Women

Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.

(1874 – 1963) American poet
Age Men Time Women

What men desire is a virgin who is a whore.

(1900 – 1977) American novelist, essayist & autobiographer
Men People Sex Women

Women’s styles may change, but their designs remain the same.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Appearance Clothing People Women