Subject: Time (Page 15)

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce… instantly.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Time

The girl with a future avoids a man with a past.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Future Men Past People Time Women

There is nothing new under the sun, but there are lots of old things we don't know.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Situations Things Time

The faster he goes, the quicker he’ll get to the pits; the slower he goes, the longer it will take.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports Time

We haven't seen that kind of violence in the name of religion in this country since we got here!'

American stand-up comedian
America History Religion Time

The first ninety percent of the task takes ninety percent of the time, and the last ten percent takes the other ninety percent.

Murphy’s Laws Time Work

I intend to live forever – so far, so good.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Life Time

The length of a marriage is inversely proportional to the amount spent on the wedding.

Marriage Money Murphy’s Laws Time

The efficiency of a committee meeting is inversely proportional to the number of participants and the time spent on deliberations.

Murphy’s Laws Time

If, in the course of several months, if only three worthwhile social events take place, they will all fall on the same evening.

Time

New Year's Day… now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions; next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Situations Time

Experience is what makes you pause briefly before going ahead and making the same mistake.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Mistakes Problems Situations Time

It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis.

(1950 – ) American science fiction writer, & publisher
Life Time

 It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.

History Memory Murphy’s Laws

Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Money Time

When there are sufficient funds in the checking account, checks take two weeks to clear; when there are insufficient funds, checks clear overnight.

Money Murphy’s Laws Time

A carelessly planned project takes three times longer to complete than expected; a carefully planned project takes only twice as long.

Murphy’s Laws Time

Those who live closest arrive latest.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Time Travel

Everything takes longer than you think.

Murphy’s Laws Time

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

(1910 – 1993) editor & novelist
Past Time

So what if I can’t spell Armaggedon? … it’s not the end of the world.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Time