Subject: Appearance (Page 13)

Accident: A condition in which presence of mind is good, but absence of body is better.

Accidents Body Mind Problems

No one is as ugly as their passport photo.

Appearance Murphy’s Laws Ugly

All the men in my family are bald, and all the women are hunchbacked – and they don’t know we’re bald.

comedian
Appearance Body Family Fathers

I can’t die… it would ruin my image.

(1914 – 2011) American exercise expert
Appearance People Self

In her last days, she resembled a spoiled pear.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Appearance Insults

I'd hire her to haunt a house!

Appearance Miscellaneous Ugly

I've never been an intellectual, but I have this look.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Appearance Intelligence

If I saw myself dressed like that, I'd have to kick my own ass.

(1966 – ) American actor, comedian, screenwriter & film producer
Appearance Clothing

My husband was so ugly, he used to stand outside the doctor’s office and make people sick.

(1894 – 1975) American comedian
Appearance Health Husbands Marriage Ugly

I look like a mix between a Jew and a guy who would drive by in a truck and yell "Jew.”

American comedian
Appearance People Self

You might be a redneck if… your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Clothing People Rednecks

Armor: The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Clothing Communication Definitions Language

If you're going to dedicate your career to ranting about the excesses of American capitalism, you probably shouldn't weigh 450 pounds.

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality
Appearance Body Fat

The longer I practice medicine the more convinced I am there are only two types of cases: those that involve taking the trousers off and those that don’t.

English author, actor, humorist & playwright
Clothing Doctors Health

Makeup: Lipstick, eyeliner, blush which ironically makes Mom look better while making her young daughter look “like a tramp.”

Appearance Definitions

My breast are so versatile now — I can wear them down, up, or side by side.

(1950 – ) American actress, singer & model
Appearance Body

Natural Bust Enlargement with Total Mind Power

Appearance Body Book Titles

His ears are so big… he heard the sun come up.

Appearance Body Exaggerations

Stomach: A bowl-shaped cavity containing the organs of indigestion.

Body Definitions

It's got lots of installation.

Appearance Clothing Malaprops

She is so fat… she laid on the beach and people tried to push her back into the ocean.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat