Subject: Communication (Page 11)

Incest is relatively boring.

Family Sex Wordplay

This book of essays… has all the depth and glitter of a worn dime.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Books Reviews/Criticism

Colin had his neck brace fitted years ago and since then he’s never looked back.


Communication Things Wordplay

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won’t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Communication Husbands Marriage Speech Time Wives

When the American people get through with the English language, it will look as if it had been run over by a musical comedy.

(1867 – 1936) author & humorist
America Communication Language Places

I wrote a few children's books… not on purpose.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Books Children Communication Reading/Writing

A simple story, however inaccurate or misleading, is preferred to a complicated explanation, however true.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

My dad suggested I register for a donor card; he’s a man after my own heart.


Communication Wordplay

A lot of people are very critical of modern reproductive processes without understanding all the ins and outs.

(1940 – ) English professor, medical doctor, scientist & politician
Sex Wordplay

And always remember the last words of my grandfather, who said, “A truck!”

(1956 – ) American comedian
Communication Death Family Language Last words

If you want your name spelled wrong, die.

Communication Death Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

It's strange, isn't it… you stand in the middle of a library and go 'Aaaaaaagghhhh' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an airplane, and everyone joins in.

(1921 – 1984) British comedian & magician
Communication Situations Speech

Interviewer: You’ve been accused of vulgarity.
Brooks: Bullshit!

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer
Communication Language

Accordionated: Being able to drive and refold a road map at the same time.

Definitions Wordplay

As a kid I was made to walk the plank… we couldn’t afford a dog.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Communication Wordplay

It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment; it’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Misspokements Speech

Perfume: What a woman hopes will make her the scenter of attention.

Definitions Wordplay

A woman's preaching is like a dog's walking on his hinter legs; it is not done well; but you are surprised to see it done at all.

(1740 – 1795) Scottish lawyer, diarist & author
Communication People Speech Women

A bore is one who has the power of speech but not the capacity for conversation.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Characteristics Communication Conversation People Speech

It ain't a bad plan to keep still occasionally even when you know what you're talking about.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Communication Speech

And for the record, all marriages are same sex marriages; you get married, and every night, it’s the same sex.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Marriage Sex Wordplay