Subject: Education (Page 12)

How is education going to make me smarter?

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Education TV/Movie Quotes

Teaching Latin to someone like me in high school was somewhat like trying to teach a pig to dance; it’s a waste of the teacher’s time and it irritates the pig.

U.S. Senator (1942 – 2015) U.S. senator (Tennessee) & actor
Education School

I had just received my degree in Calcium Anthropology… the study of milkmen.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Education

He not only overflowed with learning, but stood in the slop.

(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
Education Insults Learning

Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you wanted.

(1918 – 2002) advice columnist
Education Learning

Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Computers Dogs School Things

Learn to be sincere, even if you have to fake it.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
Characteristics Education

Graduation speeches were invented largely in the belief that college students should never be released into the world until they have been properly sedated.

(1919 – 2000) Canadian prime minister & politician
Communication School Speech

My school was so tough the school newspaper had an obituary section.

(1927 – ) American comedian
Education School

Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything one learned in school.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Education Learning Memory School

There is no direct relationship between the quality of an educational program and its cost.

Education Money Murphy’s Laws

What we learn after we know it all, is what counts.

Education Learning Murphy’s Laws

If law school is so hard to get through… how come there are so many lawyers?

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
Education Government Law Lawyers School

Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra; in real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Education Learning Life Science/Weather

Class schedules are designed so that every student will have time to waste between classes.

Education Murphy’s Laws School

A self-made man is one who believes in luck and sends his son to Oxford.

(1902 – 1983) Australian novelist & short-story writer
Education Success

What men learn from history is that men do not learn from history.

Education History Learning Murphy’s Laws People Time

The only problem with learning by experience is that you get the test before the lesson.


Education Learning

If you are truly serious about preparing your child for the future, don't teach him to subtract – teach him to deduct.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Education Future Learning

A single conversation with a wise man is better than ten years of study.

Education Learning Proverbs

I have never in my life learned anything from any man who agreed with me.

(1882 – 1950) American attorney, politician, liberal activist & actor
Education Learning