Subject: Education (Page 10)

Professor: A person whose job is to tell students how to solve the problems of life he avoided by becoming a professor.

Definitions Education

I spent three of the happiest years of my life in the fifth grade.

(1895 – 1964) comedian (wife & partner of George Burns)
Education School TV/Movie Quotes

Education is the process of moving from cocksure ignorance to thoughtful uncertainty.

Education Murphy’s Laws

Education: A technique employed to open minds so that they may go from cocksure ignorance to thoughtful uncertainty.

Definitions Education

Interviewer: Did you graduate from Auburn?
Charles: No, but I have a couple people working for me who did.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Education School Sports

A diploma only proves that you know how to look up an answer.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
Education School

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Education Sex

School teachers are not fully appreciated by parents until it rains all day Saturday.

Education Occupations Work

If, while you are in school, there is a shortage of qualified personnel in a particular field, then by the time you graduate with the necessary qualifications, that field's employment is glutted.


Education Learning Murphy’s Laws School

How is it that little children are so intelligent and men are so stupid? … it must be education that does it.

(1824 – 1895) French writer
Education Intelligence

Teaching has ruined more American novelists than drink.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Education Occupations

I took a physics course that was so hard I couldn't find the classroom.

comedian
Education School Science/Weather

When reviewing your notes before an exam, the most important will be illegible.

Education Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing School

Anatomy: A class that sounds vaguely risqué until you find out what it really involves.

Body Definitions Education School

A child can be taught not to do certain things, such as touch a hot stove, pull lamps off of tables, and wake Mommy before noon.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Children Family Learning

Don't try to teach men how to do anything in public; they can learn in private; in public they have to know.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Learning Men People

What we learn after we know it all, is what counts.

Education Learning Murphy’s Laws

If what you don't know can't hurt you, she's practically invulnerable.

Education Insults

A statesman is any politician it’s considered safe to name a school after.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
Education Government People School

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Education School

An education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease; it made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.

(1948 – ) English novelist
Education