Subject: Food/Drink (Page 27)

Whenever I want a really nice meal, I start dating again.

comedian
Dating Eating Food/Drink Relationships

When one door closes another door opens… usually a refrigerator.

Canadian-American comedian & writer
Food/Drink

When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Communication Food/Drink Language

I come from family where gravy is considered a beverage.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Family Food/Drink Relationships

L.A. is nothing but a bunch of driving, and I hate all that damn driving 'cause it interferes with my drinking.

(1964 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actress, television host
Alcohol Food/Drink Places

Cheese – milk's leap toward immortality.

(1904 – 1999) author, editor, radio host
Food/Drink Time

Meet me down in the bar! We’ll drink breakfast together.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol TV/Movie Quotes

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Food/Drink

I practice when I’m loaded.

(1925 – 1985) American jazz saxophonist
Alcohol Entertainment Music

A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.

(1897-1987) actress & comedian
Eating Food/Drink

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia?

(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
Beer England Food/Drink Places

It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like “What about lunch?”

fictional character from the book series by A. A. Milne
Communication Eating Language People Speech

Instructions: usage known.

Food/Drink Signs

Never eat anything you can't pronounce.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Food/Drink

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight.

America Food/Drink Places

You might be a redneck if… you believe that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Food/Drink People Rednecks

Zucchini: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it.

Definitions Food/Drink

He’s so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he’d burn for three days.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Alcohol Food/Drink

The food on the plane was fit for a king… “Here, King!”

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Food/Drink

Friend: That drink is slow poison.

Benchley’s reply: So who’s in a hurry?

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Alcohol Food/Drink

Woody: How’s it going Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Poor.
Woody: I’m sorry to hear that.
Norm: No, I mean pour.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes