Subject: Health (Page 19)

Right now I’m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time — I think I’ve forgotten this before.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Health Memory Situations

Groinocologist

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Doctors Health Malaprops

A study shows breast implants can cause nausea and dizziness… from all the free drinks.

(1962 – ) American actor and talk show host
Alcohol Appearance Health

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Age Health Old Places

Nurses: Patient people.

Definitions Health Occupations

My uncle died of Lou Sterrett's disease.

Health Malaprops

Plastic surgeons are always making mountains out of molehills.

(1946 – ) singer, songwriter, author & actress
Appearance Body Health

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Children Family Health Men Women

If a patient dies, the doctor killed him, but if he gets well, the saints have saved him.

Doctors Health Proverbs

Go to the gyropractor and get fixed?

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Health Malaprops

What’s Up Down There?: Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend

Book Titles Health

The doctor felt the man's purse and thought it was awfully low.

Health Malaprops

This is one of the healthiest X-rays I’ve ever seen… but if we compare that with yours…

(1972 – ) Scottish comedian
Doctors Health

You know what they call alternative medicine that's been proved to work… medicine.

(1975 – ) Australian comedian, actor, writer, musician & director
Health

A plastic surgeon's office the only place where no one gets offended when you pick your nose!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Doctors Health Occupations

I tried phone sex and got an ear infection.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Health Sex

He was in cardial arrest.

Health Malaprops

Money cannot buy health, but I'll settle for a diamond studded wheelchair.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Health Money

In the face of such overwhelming statistical possibilities, hypochondria has always seemed to me to be the only rational position to take on life.

(1953 – 2001) British journalist & broadcaster
Health

CPR: An emergency exercise that helps concerned onlookers feel useful while the victim expires.

Definitions Health

It never heals correctly.

Health Murphy’s Laws