Subject: Marriage (Page 23)

Gregory: Rose, I love you and I… I want to be married to you.
Rose: Gregory, You are married to me.
Gregory: Uh… that’s right!

(1942 – ) American singer-songwriter, actress, writer, film producer & director
Marriage TV/Movie Quotes

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage – they' ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Marriage Men

A man is incomplete until he is married; after that, he is finished.

(1917 – 2016) Hungarian-born American actress
Marriage Men People

Love, the quest; marriage, the conquest; divorce, the inquest.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Divorce Emotions Love Marriage

Monogamy leaves a lot to be desired.

Marriage

All of the troubles that some people have in life is that which they married into.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Marriage Problems

The only time that most women give their orating husbands undivided attention is when the old boys mumble in their sleep.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Husbands Marriage Situations Sleep Wives

I'll tell you one thing, I know how to satisfy my wife in bed… I leave.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Marriage Sex Situations Wives

Marry an outdoors woman; then if you throw her out into the yard for the night, she can still survive.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Marriage People Women

Tennis is like marrying for money; ‘love’ means nothing.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Emotions Love Marriage Sports

Newlywed: What you and your spouse will officially be considered until your first anniversary, or until you go an entire week without sex (whichever comes first).

Definitions Marriage

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Activities Husbands Marriage Relationships Sleep Things Wives

I thought when I was 41, I would be married with kids… well, to be honest I thought I would be married with weekend access.

(1965 – ) British-Irish comedian, writer & actor
Children Family Marriage

There's a new Playboy for married men – and it has the same centerfold every month.

(1959 – ) American comedian, actress & singer
Husbands Marriage

I support gay marriage because I believe they have a right to be just as miserable as the rest of us.

(1944 – ) American singer, songwriter, novelist, humorist, politician & columnist
Marriage

Generally speaking, my wife is generally speaking.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Communication Marriage Speech Wives

I married beneath me – all women do.

(1879 – 1964) British politician
Marriage Women

I’d like to marry a nice domesticated homosexual with a fetish for wiping down Formica and different vacuum-cleaner attachments.

(1960 – ) English comedian, novelist & actress
Housework Marriage Men

Whenever you want to marry someone, go have lunch with his ex-wife.

(1920 – 2006) American actress
Marriage Wives

If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.

(1907 – 2003) American actress of film, stage & television
Communication Marriage

Husbands are awkward things to deal with; even keeping them in hot water will not make them tender.

Husbands Marriage