Subject: Problems (Page 6)

If all else fails, try the obvious.

Problems Proverbs Situations

How come dumb stuff seems so smart while you're doing it?

cartoon character, created by Hank Ketcham (1920 – 2001)
Problems Situations

In any collection of data, the figure most obviously correct, beyond all need of checking, is the mistake.

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems

Experience is what makes you pause briefly before going ahead and making the same mistake.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Mistakes Problems Situations Time

The last person who quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong – until the next person quits or is fired.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws Problems

Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.

Definitions Mistakes

Some mistakes are too fun to make only once.

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems

My daughter's tricycle said “Some Assembly Required” … it came in a jar!

(1957 – ) American stand-up comedian, actor & screenwriter
Children Family Problems

Alimony is a system by which, when two people make a mistake, one of them continues to pay for it.

(1893 – 1957) American actress & celebrity
Marriage Mistakes Money

If I could kick the person in the tail that causes me the most problems I could not sit down for a week.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
People Problems Self

The squeaky wheel gets replaced.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations

I am not part of the problem, I am a Republican.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Misspokements Problems Speech

My life has been full of terrible misfortunes most of which never happened.

(1533 – 1592) French writer
Life Problems

A $300 picture tube will protect a 10¢ fuse by blowing first.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

The worst thing about accidents in the kitchen is that you usually have to eat them.


Accidents Cooking Food/Drink Problems

I’ve seen my mom wrestle two cops to the ground with a taser dart in her neck, and you cry when your shoes pinch.

(1961 – ) American comedian, actor & talk show host
Problems

Anything hit with a big enough hammer will fall apart.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Things

Whenever you decide to take the kids home, it is always five minutes earlier that they break into fights, tears, or hysteria.

Children Murphy’s Laws Problems Time

If anything can go wrong, it will do so in triplicate.

Government Murphy’s Laws Problems

Experience: What causes a person to make new mistakes instead of the same old ones.

Definitions Mistakes

I found out that it's not good to talk about my troubles; eighty percent of the people don't care and the other twenty percent are glad you're having trouble.

Los Angeles Dodgers’ manager
Baseball People Problems Sports