Subject: Science/Weather

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Life Science/Weather

When I took office, only high energy physicists had ever heard of what is called the Worldwide Web…. Now even my cat has its own page.

Animals Cats Science/Weather Time

Space is almost infinite; as a matter of fact, we think it is infinite.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Misspokements Places Science/Weather

There is no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather.

(1819 – 1900) English art critic, social thinker, poet & artist
Science/Weather

In the school I went to, they asked a kid to prove the law of gravity and he threw the teacher out of the window.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Education School Science/Weather

I don’t know why I should have to learn Algebra… I’m never likely to go there.

(1942 – ) Scottish comedian, musician & actor
Places Science/Weather

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Science/Weather

I bought some powdered water, but I don't know what to add to it.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Science/Weather

How do you write zero in Roman numerals?

Science/Weather

Scientists who dislike the restraints of highly organized research like to remark that a truly great research worker needs only three pieces of equipment – a pencil, a piece of paper, and a brain… but they quote this maxim more often at academic banquets than at budget hearings.

Money Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

A computer program does what you tell it to do, not what you want it to do.

Science/Weather

It was a dry rain.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Science/Weather Yogi-isms

It doesn't matter what temperature the room is, it's always room temperature.

Science/Weather Situations

Love is a matter of chemistry; sex is a matter of physics.

Emotions Love Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

Men and women belong to different species, and communication between them is a science still in its infancy.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Communication Men People Science/Weather Women

You might be a redneck if… you think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three primary colors.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Science/Weather

I shop at a computer store called 'Your Crap's Already Obsolete.'

(1953 – ) American comedian & writer
Science/Weather

You know it is summer in Ireland when the rain gets warmer.

(1892 – 1992) American film & television producer & director
Places Science/Weather

Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
People Science/Weather

Free Advice: Bundle Up When Out In the Cold

Cold Headlines

Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.

Money Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Things