Subject: Time (Page 16)

Those who live closest arrive latest.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Time Travel

I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Alcohol Death Food/Drink Time

The first ninety percent of the task takes ninety percent of the time, and the last ten percent takes the other ninety percent.

Murphy’s Laws Time

If you are truly serious about preparing your child for the future, don't teach him to subtract – teach him to deduct.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Education Future Learning

So little time and so little to do.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Activities Time

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Age Congress Government Time

I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn’t have to go so fast.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Sports Time

Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?

Money Time

Even if a farmer intends to loaf, he gets up in time to get an early start.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Time

I have a time machine at home; it only goes forward at regular speed.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Things Time

Only time can heal your broken heart, just as only time can heal his broken arms and legs.

Muppet character (Frank Oz)
Time TV/Movie Quotes

By doing just a little every day, I can gradually let the task overwhelm me.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Situations Time Work

Live each day as if it were your last… because one day, you’ll be right.

(1924 – 1992) English comedian & actor
Death Life Time

I’ve seen the future and it’s much like the present… only longer.

(1953 – 1998) baseball player
Future Misspokements Time

Love is the only industry which can't operate on a five-day week.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Emotions Love Time Work

I guess that’s the earliest I’ve ever been late.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Time Yogi-isms

It’s a battle with himself and with the ticking fingers of the clock.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Time

Retirement: The time of life when you stop lying about your age and start lying about the house.

Definitions Time Work

New Year's Day… now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions; next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Situations Time

A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life.

(1948 – 1990) comedian
Divorce Marriage Time Wives

Everything takes more time and money.

Life Money Murphy’s Laws Time