Author: Anonymous Page 28

If you don't want someone to get your goat, don't let them know where it's tied.

Expressions

Farmer: A handy man with a sense of humus.

Definitions Wordplay

Delayed Payment: A tourniquet applied at the pockets.

Definitions Money

Genealogy: Chasing your own tale.

Definitions Family

Organic Farm: Tilling like it is.

Definitions

“I prefer trout to salmon,” Tom said officiously.

Tom Swifties

You must have ears like an eagle.

Mixed metaphors

When arguing with a stupid person, be sure he isn’t doing the same thing.

Fools Intelligence

Chip Shot: A short, low approach shot that gets a player into position for one or more missed puts.

Definitions Golf Sports

Idle hands are the mother of invention.

Mixed metaphors

You have to walk before you can swim.

Mixed metaphors

I’m just talking out loud.

Mixed metaphors

“This looks like the fruit of the blackthorn,” said Tom slowly.

Tom Swifties

Housewarming: The last call for wedding presents.

Definitions

“Doctor, why do you have to remove my womb?” asked Mary hysterically.

Tom Swifties

Eating humble crow

Misspokements

Bury it under the carpet

Mixed metaphors

Fish: An animal that grows fastest between the time it is caught and the time a fisherman describes it to his friends.

Activities Animals Definitions

Long road to hoe

Malaprops

Economist: A man who knows more about money than the people who have it.

Definitions Occupations People

Egotist: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

Definitions