Subject: Appearance (Page 10)

A woman whose face looked as if it had been made of sugar and someone had licked it.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Appearance Insults

I would say the world's in terrible shape, but I'm afraid the world would say, 'Look who's talking!'

(1943 – 1974) American singer (Mamas & Papas)
Appearance Body Fat People Places Self World

I told my psychiatrist I keep thinking I’m ugly and he told me to lay on the couch… face down!

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Doctors Health Ugly

My knees look like they lost a knife fight with a midget.

professional football player
Appearance Body Football Health Sports

We know Jesus can’t have been English; he is always wearing sandals, but never with socks.

(1958 – 2006) English radio performer, stand-up comic & writer
Appearance England Places

Never in the history of fashion has so little material been raised so high to reveal so much that needs to be covered so badly.

(1904 – 1980) English photographer, interior, stage & costume designer
Appearance Clothing

Jewelry takes people's minds off your wrinkles.

(1912 – 1969) Norwegian figure skater & actress
Age Appearance Old Things

He looked like a half-melted rubber bulldog.

(1925 – ) American author and literary, theater & film critic
Appearance Insults

He was young – He was fair – But the Injuns – Raised his hair

Conflict Epitaphs Hair Young

I want to get a tattoo of myself on my entire body only 2” taller.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Appearance Body

Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Appearance Body Dance People

He is so fat… he can't even jump to a conclusion.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

Reporter: What do you call that hairstyle you’re wearing?

Harrison Arthur.

(1943 – 2001) English musician, singer & songwriter
Appearance Hair

She is so fat… when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back party.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

Obesity is really widespread.

Appearance Fat Wordplay

She's been married so many times she has rice marks on her face.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Appearance Insults Marriage

Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Appearance Insults

If the shoe fits, it’s ugly.

Clothing Murphy’s Laws Ugly

Hamper: A wicker container with a lid, usually surrounded by, but not containing, dirty clothing.

Clothing Definitions

Her mouth looks like a jaybird’s ass in pokeberry time.

Appearance Expressions

Human beings are seventy percent water, and with some the rest is collagen.

(1943 – ) comedian & actor
Appearance Body People