Subject: Appearance (Page 52)

It is totally impossible to be well dressed in cheap shoes.

(1909 – 2003) English fashion designer
Appearance Clothing

He looked as inconspicuous as a tarantula on a slice of angel food.

(1888 – 1959) detective novelist & screenwriter
Appearance

Comparing Madonna with Marilyn Monroe is like comparing Raquel Welch with the back of a bus.

George Alan O'Dowd (1961 – ) British singer-songwriter
Appearance Body People

I belong to a gym now… well, let me rephrase that: I don't belong there at all, but I go.

(1969 – ) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Body

Well, well, well. Look what the cat cleaned up, showered, exfoliated, powdered, lipsticked, Gucci’d and dragged in.

(1958 – ) American actress & singer
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes

Abdicate: To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

Body Definitions

Just another female woman. Take away her eyes, her nose, her mouth, her legs and what have you got? A blank expression.

(1914 – 2008) screenwriter
Appearance People

I look like a mix between a Jew and a guy who would drive by in a truck and yell "Jew.”

American comedian
Appearance People Self

If I saw myself dressed like that, I'd have to kick my own ass.

(1966 – ) American actor, comedian, screenwriter & film producer
Appearance Clothing

That's the time of your life when even your birthday suit needs pressing.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Age Appearance Body Old

Joe Frazier is so ugly he should donate his face to the US Bureau of Wildlife.

(1942 – ) American boxing champion
Appearance Insults

We were making love and I took the bag off my head.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Appearance Death Ugly

You know how embarrassing it is to walk with a girl on a first date and see somebody with the same shirt as you on – and they homeless?

American stand-up comedian
Appearance Clothing Dating Relationships

Crying is the refuge of plain women, but the ruin of pretty ones.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Appearance People Women

Smile, it enhances your face value.

(1946 – ) singer, songwriter, author & actress
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes

I told my girlfriend that it looked like she was drawing her eyebrows too high… she looked surprised.

Appearance

I saw a guy today who had rings and hooks and pens and antennas hanging out his cheeks and his eyebrows; looked like somebody hit him in the head with a tackle box.

(1973 – ) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Body

I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance People Self Ugly

On the other hand… you have different fingers.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Body Communication Language

A four-hundred-dollar suit on him would look like socks on a rooster.

(1895 – 1960) American politician
Appearance Clothing Insults

Maternity sweater, $52. Comes in unisex sizes.

Classifieds Clothing